In the spirit of 2009's New Year's Resolutions...
I won't hide from you anymore. I won't shudder away from your heartbreak and ugliness, but neither will I give in to pessimism - because you are beautiful, world. So beautiful that there is no sense in staring into the darkness and ignoring the light.
I will not be afraid to be me. I will wear my cartoonish t-shirts. I will proudly talk about the fictional characters who babble in my head. I will happily admit that I name all my stuffed animals, my laptop, and my car. (The laptop is Dillon. The car is Scout. In case you were wondering.) I will laugh loudly and cry over the dead deer on the side of the road, and I will never, ever apologize for it.
I will thank God every day for my life, because I am blessed. Immeasurably, overwhelmingly blessed.
I will write and revise STRANGE AND BEAUTIFUL.
I will finish the first draft of a third book.
I will try really, really hard to attend SCBWI in LA this summer, and Kody's book launch in NYC.
But, dear world, I can't accuarately describe most of my resolutions for this year, because they're not specific, quantifiable ideas.
My greatest resolution for 2010 is just to live. To appreciate my family and my friends like I never have before. To do things that scare me. To give like I have endless possessions; to love like I'll never be hurt.
A lot of people had really crappy 2009s. Looking back on it, I am astonished at how good this year was. It was a mixture of the heartbreaking and the beautiful. It threw painful, confusing situations at me - but it also gave me moments of total awesomeness. I finished my first year of college, and I started my second. I spent some amazing time with my family. I made new friends - both in the writing-verse and in real life. I drove across the country with my dad, and during that drive I received three offers of representation from three different agents. I signed with one of those agents, and I haven't had any regrets at all.
2009 showed me what I was made of. 2009 gave me the tools I'll need to face 2010.
So, in the words of my blogger friend Gael -
Bring it on.
On December 31st, 2009 07:35 pm (UTC), (Anonymous) commented:
What a beautiful resolution list for a truly beautiful person, both inside and out! I pray for God to bless you personally and professionally this year! And I thank him for bring people like u into my life!
PS SCBWI whatever is in LA? Dude, I'm there!!